InGovernment, InSexurity

Every other security guru in town is talking about the loss of 25m records from HMRC, I’m not going to.

Instead, I turn to another consumer fraud favourite – online dating. I know that other security researchers are looking at sites like (In summary: “Avoid, its all guys and fakes”).
On, they make an effort to match people using a secret algorithm, which I have to say has found very sweet women miles away from me. It also found me “Gabriel, Westminster”, who decided she wanted to bypass eharmony’s “guided communication” and go straight to chatting. (First Red Flag)

Gabriel West: Hello
Kensei: Hi there!
Gabriel West: Good Morning
Kensei: And good morning to you
Gabriel West: Wow it’s really good to see you online here
Kensei: Thanks, I don’t have many Yahoo contacts, perhaps you’re special somehow
Gabriel West: Wow
Gabriel West: You are gonna me start Blushing
Gabriel West: How Am i Special Jon?
Kensei: Well, I’m hoping you can play the piano with your toes, that would be awesome!
Gabriel West: Hnmmn Thanks
Gabriel West: so tell me what are you really looking forward for on Eharmony?
Kensei: So, what brought a stunning woman like you to eHarmony?
Gabriel West: I am on Eharmony to look for a man that can have me as wife somedat
Gabriel West: y
Kensei: What do you look for in a man?
(She drops, and returns)
Gabriel West: Sorry i got Disconnected
Kensei: No worries
Kensei: So, do you live or work in Westminster?
Gabriel West: No
Gabriel West: I am Originally from Westminster…but Presently in West Africa with my Mom
(Second red flag)
Gabriel West: You?
Kensei: I live to the West of london
Kensei: How long have you been in West Africa?
(She drops and returns – notice the pattern when I ask a question that’s not on the script)
Gabriel West: Sorry i got Disconnected again
Kensei: no problem.
Kensei: So how long have you been out in west africa?
Gabriel West: I’ve been here for a very long time
Gabriel West: my mom, She brought me along with her to west africa when i was a little girl,cos she used to work for the missionaries lately but not anymore
Kensei: What did she do for the missionaries?
Gabriel West: she quited cos she developed a very serious heart problem which affected her breathing system, so right now she’s under medication and hoping to getting better real soon, she needs an urgent operation to be carried out on her lungs and after that she’ll be alright by God’s grace….. She works as a Medical Missionary
(Third Red Flag: This will be the “money hook”, perhaps together with an appeal for money for a flight home)
Kensei: I havnet heard of those – what do they do?
Gabriel West: She Grant Applications Information about Medical Missions
Gabriel West: So tell me what do you do and what are you looking for on here?
Kensei: Well, I’m a fraud expert, and I’ve recently been exposing people who are scamming money on dating sites.
Gabriel West: Oh Ic
Gabriel West: Are you Married? and what would you like to know about me?
Kensei: Do you enjoy long distance relationships?
Gabriel West: Ask Google
(She drops and does not return – finally, the penny has dropped)

For those of you looking for love and romance, go and join a choir, take up Ceroc dancing (or tango if you must), do anything that is less likely to cause you grief that picking up strangers over the Internet.

For those of you still interested in the HMRC records thing, have a look on ebay.

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